*day 9 after the break up*
baru back from cell group's gathering. gastric strike agAIN... gosh... and it took me about two hours to recover from it. sigh.
must ian lo have to treat me like that? where have i done wrong for him to treat me so? SHYT...
today's his off day. around 11am like that, he went to padini. bringing the girl he just fished. ouh God...................... why did he have to do so????!!! it's ONLY day 9!!!!! WTH!!!!!!!! wearing that white tee that he bought together with me. and today he bought the black. ladies' and men's. which means, one for him and the other one for tat girl. why?????????????? just to show off??????? what have i done wrong for him to hurt me so???????????????!!!!! God..... i'm seriously hurt. made the payment at my counter some more! MY counter!!!! i HAD to serve him as a customer!!!!!! SHYT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i HAD to act pro!! and those shitty things were forced to be done!
What the heck!!!!!!!!! i did nothing wrong that deserve me to be treated so!! when he was with me, i saw a kiss mark on his neck. and all i did was kept an eye closed!! he betrayed me when with me d..... who the heck he think he is to treat me so!!!!!!!!!!!!
i earn more than him.
richer than him. at least, i dont ask for pocket money after i started working and i even gave mum part of my salary!
the car i'm driving now is under my name. he doesnt have any property.
i dont have to take more than three years to pass a diploma in business admin with merely 30 subjects. lin is near to graduation. and he still resitting papers!!!!!!
SHYT!!!!!!!!!
he didnt have any right to treat me so! he doesnt have the right to do so!
what is it so good to show off? the girl is not any pretty. ONLY sexy. colleague even said "she's pretty meh? sexy nia leh...."
SHYT!!!!!!!! plum plum de... at first i thought she 22 or 23 when fadzril asked me to guess her age.
what is it good to show off? that he can have another gurl within 9 days? what the heck!
what kind of girlfriend can she be? only a simple girlfriend on bed i believe.
it's ONLY day 9!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! derrrrrrrrrr..........
colleagues were on my side. that he shouldnt do so. shouldnt bring his new girl to me.
he's much more than too over!
i handed him into God's hand. God wont let me being bullied unreasonably. ian lo wei liang will have his returns for what he had done to me. and whatever he gets, no one will pity him.
he'll fail his upcoming papers if God wants him to.
he'll marry that girl in months' time if God wants him to.
the girl will show her true colours no longer after that if it's God's will.
he'll never ever success if God wants him to.
"if you dumped me, you'll be in trouble," that's what i told him before.
i wont get any people to beat him up.
remember? my backup is the Almighty Lord God..
May 29, 2008
May 28, 2008
dropped
*day 8 after the break up*
my weight is DROPPING!!!!!!!!!
dead..........
i'm so dead............
i'm underweight already...
and now my weight is dropping.
it's my off day today.
ate nothing much still.
not even half a bowl of porridge as breakfast.
no lunch.
less than half of my normal portion for dinner.
house has digital scale.
stood on it
and it shows..............................
41.5Kg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dead...........
so what if i'm an universal donor??????? i'm underweight!!!!!! doctors wont let me to donate my blood....
Lord...... what am i going to do??????
did nothing much for the whole day either. mum bang-ed on my door when it was not even 8.30AM. OMG...... after breakfast, sent mum's car for a wash. then went springie agAIN... saw ian when wanted to go parkson. dead agAIN... trembled when saw him. SHYT..... then went starbucks to have a sit. around 1145am, my turn to let my car had a bath. then homed. poooooooooooFFFFFF.... a day has passed without nothing much.
sigh
my weight is dropping........................................
my weight is DROPPING!!!!!!!!!
dead..........
i'm so dead............
i'm underweight already...
and now my weight is dropping.
it's my off day today.
ate nothing much still.
not even half a bowl of porridge as breakfast.
no lunch.
less than half of my normal portion for dinner.
house has digital scale.
stood on it
and it shows..............................
41.5Kg!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
dead...........
so what if i'm an universal donor??????? i'm underweight!!!!!! doctors wont let me to donate my blood....
Lord...... what am i going to do??????
did nothing much for the whole day either. mum bang-ed on my door when it was not even 8.30AM. OMG...... after breakfast, sent mum's car for a wash. then went springie agAIN... saw ian when wanted to go parkson. dead agAIN... trembled when saw him. SHYT..... then went starbucks to have a sit. around 1145am, my turn to let my car had a bath. then homed. poooooooooooFFFFFF.... a day has passed without nothing much.
sigh
my weight is dropping........................................
May 26, 2008
God is my refuge
*day 6 after the break up*
finally i know the main reason of why ian could break with me mercilessly. and it's simply because he failed to 'zo diao' me. *read in hokkien*
what the heck! if for that reason he dumped me, i dont mind he just tell me frankly. but NOT finding bones in an egg!!!*a mandarin saying* beated around the bush and found himself lotsa unreasonable excuses to break with me. WTH lar him....
and now... i got really really angry. no one will ever know how angry am i. he's now fishing a girl from miniature corner. guess she's no longer virgin also. i told my Lord, "since he likes to 'zo diao' his gurls so much, then he MUST marry the girl after me by hook or by crook. no matter how bitchy is that girl, he has to marry her by all means. cause he made her pregnanted."
that's what i told my Lord.
people, i didnt want to curse him. but he really got me super duper angry. picked on all my faults silly-ly and unreasonably. those excuses are not excuses! i can tell God that i treated him whole heartedly. although sometimes i disturbed him by praising how handsome is ah feng. and i was just kidding. man, i treated him whole heartedly! i find myself no mistakes! SHYT........ my backup is not any black traid or what but the Almighty Lord God! God is always watching what he had done and said to me. i believe righteousness is in the hand of God. think, before messing up with my Lord the almighty ones.
ehren and irena said i'm alim. okay, i admit. i'm alim. remember the ten commandments from Lord? one of them is "Do not commit adultery".
so guys out there, think twice before planning to get me. not that i'm playing hard-to-get. just that i'm alim.
actually it's fine with me if he told me that he wanted to break with me cause he failed to 'zo diao' me. true! it's fine.. what i need is a simple truth. NOT lies. dont tell me that i'm this and that when even those who've been my friends for years dont feel that i'm like that. WTH!!!!!!!!!!
it's day 6. i'm without appetite for proper meals these days. whenever i see food, i feel like vomiting. guess what i had today... a plate of fried mee by my mum and a glass of milk as breakfast. lunch time no appetite. saw lily and marie, then ate a cone at desserts. ONLY a cone. dinner break ate NOTHING. God...... i've really lost my appetite. i see food, i thought of ian messing up with his gurls. i feel nauseatic. near to vomiting d. so i'd just turn my head away and headed off from foodcourt. rather walk around springie. thank God i didnt get gastric pain tho...^^ i got sth like aneroxia i guess. SHYT......
finally i know the main reason of why ian could break with me mercilessly. and it's simply because he failed to 'zo diao' me. *read in hokkien*
what the heck! if for that reason he dumped me, i dont mind he just tell me frankly. but NOT finding bones in an egg!!!*a mandarin saying* beated around the bush and found himself lotsa unreasonable excuses to break with me. WTH lar him....
and now... i got really really angry. no one will ever know how angry am i. he's now fishing a girl from miniature corner. guess she's no longer virgin also. i told my Lord, "since he likes to 'zo diao' his gurls so much, then he MUST marry the girl after me by hook or by crook. no matter how bitchy is that girl, he has to marry her by all means. cause he made her pregnanted."
that's what i told my Lord.
people, i didnt want to curse him. but he really got me super duper angry. picked on all my faults silly-ly and unreasonably. those excuses are not excuses! i can tell God that i treated him whole heartedly. although sometimes i disturbed him by praising how handsome is ah feng. and i was just kidding. man, i treated him whole heartedly! i find myself no mistakes! SHYT........ my backup is not any black traid or what but the Almighty Lord God! God is always watching what he had done and said to me. i believe righteousness is in the hand of God. think, before messing up with my Lord the almighty ones.
ehren and irena said i'm alim. okay, i admit. i'm alim. remember the ten commandments from Lord? one of them is "Do not commit adultery".
so guys out there, think twice before planning to get me. not that i'm playing hard-to-get. just that i'm alim.
i am ALIM.
i am ALIM.
i am ALIM.
i am ALIM.
sarah tan is ALIM!!!!!!!
actually it's fine with me if he told me that he wanted to break with me cause he failed to 'zo diao' me. true! it's fine.. what i need is a simple truth. NOT lies. dont tell me that i'm this and that when even those who've been my friends for years dont feel that i'm like that. WTH!!!!!!!!!!
it's day 6. i'm without appetite for proper meals these days. whenever i see food, i feel like vomiting. guess what i had today... a plate of fried mee by my mum and a glass of milk as breakfast. lunch time no appetite. saw lily and marie, then ate a cone at desserts. ONLY a cone. dinner break ate NOTHING. God...... i've really lost my appetite. i see food, i thought of ian messing up with his gurls. i feel nauseatic. near to vomiting d. so i'd just turn my head away and headed off from foodcourt. rather walk around springie. thank God i didnt get gastric pain tho...^^ i got sth like aneroxia i guess. SHYT......
May 25, 2008
Devondale
*day 5 after the break up*
ponder: why must i preten to be super duper happy when facing ian while i'm still quite hurt inside? just to let him feel better for breaking up with me? ****! what am i doing?!! he's should be feeling guilty what....
righteousness is in God's hands. u believe? i believe. and i strongly believe it! guess what......
the bitchy backstabber got a fault note from one of the O.E., and that's steve who gave her. boooooohoooooooooOOOO.... she deserves that! not me witchy kay? cause she's far toO bitchy than what i've imagined. she didnt even care about what her supervisor said, didnt even respect him, thought that she's older than him so her supervisor should respect her by all means. WT lar her.... bitchy bitch! always brain wash others also. sien chin....
did stupid and silly mistake again... but didnt void receipt lar... thank God tho... hope this will be the last time for me to get so tension. blurb......
couldnt figure out why ian tergamak to dump me. sien lar... my family always has the table manners. i.e. call the elders to eat before the youngers start eating, wait for the elders to start eating then only the youngers can start eating. and that's what i did when having meals with him. i was the only one among his ex-es who did that. yet he managed to dump me mercilessly. swt...........
guess most of the people at padini knows that i've broke up with him. careless about his bitchy supervisor and colleagues who taught him to break up with me. i mean, the others.
my dinner break time was the same as his. went foodcourt. sat on a same table, but with another colleague in between us. i didnt care when his dinner dropped on the floor. *not that i dont wanna care, just dont know what stand do i have to care, so pretended as if it had nothing got to do with me*
wonder if he's okay or not, he was on full shift for two consecutive days d... hmm......
lack of Ca... backbone aching like nuts ler... i had no choice, went buy Devondale at ta kiong... silly sarah tan... lacking of Ca.... phek chek.... sheeeeEsh......
have been texting my big ko ko for few days d... i kesian my credit... cause he's not in my friends and family list. and once we text, can have more than 30texts per day. ooouccchhhhhHHH.... my credit arRRRRRRR.....
ponder: why must i preten to be super duper happy when facing ian while i'm still quite hurt inside? just to let him feel better for breaking up with me? ****! what am i doing?!! he's should be feeling guilty what....
righteousness is in God's hands. u believe? i believe. and i strongly believe it! guess what......
the bitchy backstabber got a fault note from one of the O.E., and that's steve who gave her. boooooohoooooooooOOOO.... she deserves that! not me witchy kay? cause she's far toO bitchy than what i've imagined. she didnt even care about what her supervisor said, didnt even respect him, thought that she's older than him so her supervisor should respect her by all means. WT lar her.... bitchy bitch! always brain wash others also. sien chin....
did stupid and silly mistake again... but didnt void receipt lar... thank God tho... hope this will be the last time for me to get so tension. blurb......
couldnt figure out why ian tergamak to dump me. sien lar... my family always has the table manners. i.e. call the elders to eat before the youngers start eating, wait for the elders to start eating then only the youngers can start eating. and that's what i did when having meals with him. i was the only one among his ex-es who did that. yet he managed to dump me mercilessly. swt...........
guess most of the people at padini knows that i've broke up with him. careless about his bitchy supervisor and colleagues who taught him to break up with me. i mean, the others.
my dinner break time was the same as his. went foodcourt. sat on a same table, but with another colleague in between us. i didnt care when his dinner dropped on the floor. *not that i dont wanna care, just dont know what stand do i have to care, so pretended as if it had nothing got to do with me*
wonder if he's okay or not, he was on full shift for two consecutive days d... hmm......
lack of Ca... backbone aching like nuts ler... i had no choice, went buy Devondale at ta kiong... silly sarah tan... lacking of Ca.... phek chek.... sheeeeEsh......
have been texting my big ko ko for few days d... i kesian my credit... cause he's not in my friends and family list. and once we text, can have more than 30texts per day. ooouccchhhhhHHH.... my credit arRRRRRRR.....
May 24, 2008
carnival sale!
sale sale sale! today's the first day of the carnival sale. and i got really really terribly vegetably TIRED!!! i was so so so the very tired that i even went to the locker area to stretch my muscles. this was my first time to stretch my muscles. i did mistakes which required me to void receipts. so, imagine that. i'm really TIRED.
hmmm.... the sale is up to 50%.. didnt come across any merchandise with 70% dicount, so i guess the sale is up to 50%. by the end of the day, the sale is quite promising. with a closing of RM32k ++.. hehe...
went MPH before work. reached springie kinda early so walked around.. bought two books. both got to do with christianity. one of them is "purpose driven life". kudos to ravindran! i got 10% discount each.*clap clap* cause ravindran works there, so can get staff price.*evil laugh* this is the first time that i bought books without second thought. some more, it's end of month, my purse is kinda thirsty XD
THANKS ravindran!!!^^
a funny colleague i have. he asked if i'm single not. once i said i'm still single..... guess what did he say...........
"then i have chance lar hor?"
swt.................................-__________-"
even asked if i need a ride when going home. okay, i know he's just kidding. thank God, he's just kidding. although he didnt say that. but, somehow, i just know that he's kidding =p
phew!!!
=====================================
i miss kidsgames lar....... saw jason john and rachel today. made me thought of those fun times during kidsgames. hmmmmmmmm...........=]
as for ian lo....... guess he got his results for the recent paper that he resit-ed for. hope that he did okay for it.... God bless him lor.... still thought of him whole day. WTH! wonder if he still reads my blog. he has my link de... ehee...
kate winslet's "what if" worth try listening. not bad....
......... what if i've never let u go....
that's all for today i guess... nitez all... God bless..
*day 4 after the break up*
hmmm.... the sale is up to 50%.. didnt come across any merchandise with 70% dicount, so i guess the sale is up to 50%. by the end of the day, the sale is quite promising. with a closing of RM32k ++.. hehe...
went MPH before work. reached springie kinda early so walked around.. bought two books. both got to do with christianity. one of them is "purpose driven life". kudos to ravindran! i got 10% discount each.*clap clap* cause ravindran works there, so can get staff price.*evil laugh* this is the first time that i bought books without second thought. some more, it's end of month, my purse is kinda thirsty XD
THANKS ravindran!!!^^
a funny colleague i have. he asked if i'm single not. once i said i'm still single..... guess what did he say...........
"then i have chance lar hor?"
swt.................................-__________-"
even asked if i need a ride when going home. okay, i know he's just kidding. thank God, he's just kidding. although he didnt say that. but, somehow, i just know that he's kidding =p
phew!!!
=====================================
i miss kidsgames lar....... saw jason john and rachel today. made me thought of those fun times during kidsgames. hmmmmmmmm...........=]
as for ian lo....... guess he got his results for the recent paper that he resit-ed for. hope that he did okay for it.... God bless him lor.... still thought of him whole day. WTH! wonder if he still reads my blog. he has my link de... ehee...
kate winslet's "what if" worth try listening. not bad....
......... what if i've never let u go....
that's all for today i guess... nitez all... God bless..
*day 4 after the break up*
May 23, 2008
familiar faces
*day 3 after the break up*
ponder:
why were me moulded to be a tough, independent and optimistic since i was small? is it that God wants me to prepare me for the break up? hmmm......
sienz... cant sleep late tonight. tomorrow's the first day of the carnival sales. have to wake up early to stand by in case there'll be a big flow of customers tomorrow morning. so.... no dvd tonight. luckily it's still kinda early that i can have some blogging. thank God.... phew!^^
big ko ko back to kl. sent him off through texts. aha~
friends, thanks for the concern. *u know who u are* i'm okay d... no more low mood, no more tears, no more silly and stupid thoughts. except for the fact that i still love him.*fainting? not worth it right? i know that... paiseh... ehee...*
aha~ what to post.... hmm....
oyea.. saw friends. lots and lotsa friends shopped at padini these days. today i saw marie and marilyn the twins with lily.. and mr ng also... days before i saw lotsa long-didnt-see people.=D
saw mr leong with his wife and and and his SON! teeheehee... people from 5S3'05 of SMK Kuching High, remember him? mr leong arrr... ah leong arrr... leong sy jian arr... hehe... he has a son d looOO... bt one or two years old like that. very cute, very clever de ei... hehe...
then i saw the pretty PA teacher of U6S2'07. she remembers me ei... miracle... i wasnt taught by her, but i did greet her when i met her around at school. hehe...
then i saw ms voon also... never know that she still remember me toO... same thing, i wasnt taught by her. only talked to her before during the 2006's merdeka thingy and greeted her when saw her at school.
mdm orlnda also lor... aha~ guess what did she say about the new batch of lower sixers? hehehehe.....+evil laugh+ 'they looked blurrrr...' that's what she told me.:rofl:
and bla bla bla.... lotsa ppl lar... it's a torment to have sarah tan cracks her brain for all these kay? hiak hiakz....
sarah tan is stupid. she still cares for whatever things that gotto do with ian lo.
this evening after my dinner break with ah feng, a quite good looking guy, i overheard a short conversation between andrew and him. andrew told ah feng that ian will be going home around 730pm. cause overtime. they have lotsa things to do and prepare for tomorrow. after then i was thinking of him for quite a long time until he punched out around eight oclock. if back then, i'd tell him to rest more, drink more water and take good care of himself before he went off. and now.... i said nothing. i cant say anything. i dont have the stand to say all these either. can only worry him without his acknowledgement. maybe... will remember him in my prayer at times.-_-"
i like the song 'cant stop a river'. especially the lyrics. a sentence or two before the song ends is nice.
........... cant stop a river from flowing to a sea.. cant stop my heart from loving you....
aha~
gotta stop here. tata... nitey nitez all... everyone in this wonderful world!!
God bless....^_-
ponder:
why were me moulded to be a tough, independent and optimistic since i was small? is it that God wants me to prepare me for the break up? hmmm......
sienz... cant sleep late tonight. tomorrow's the first day of the carnival sales. have to wake up early to stand by in case there'll be a big flow of customers tomorrow morning. so.... no dvd tonight. luckily it's still kinda early that i can have some blogging. thank God.... phew!^^
big ko ko back to kl. sent him off through texts. aha~
friends, thanks for the concern. *u know who u are* i'm okay d... no more low mood, no more tears, no more silly and stupid thoughts. except for the fact that i still love him.*fainting? not worth it right? i know that... paiseh... ehee...*
aha~ what to post.... hmm....
oyea.. saw friends. lots and lotsa friends shopped at padini these days. today i saw marie and marilyn the twins with lily.. and mr ng also... days before i saw lotsa long-didnt-see people.=D
saw mr leong with his wife and and and his SON! teeheehee... people from 5S3'05 of SMK Kuching High, remember him? mr leong arrr... ah leong arrr... leong sy jian arr... hehe... he has a son d looOO... bt one or two years old like that. very cute, very clever de ei... hehe...
then i saw the pretty PA teacher of U6S2'07. she remembers me ei... miracle... i wasnt taught by her, but i did greet her when i met her around at school. hehe...
then i saw ms voon also... never know that she still remember me toO... same thing, i wasnt taught by her. only talked to her before during the 2006's merdeka thingy and greeted her when saw her at school.
mdm orlnda also lor... aha~ guess what did she say about the new batch of lower sixers? hehehehe.....+evil laugh+ 'they looked blurrrr...' that's what she told me.:rofl:
and bla bla bla.... lotsa ppl lar... it's a torment to have sarah tan cracks her brain for all these kay? hiak hiakz....
sarah tan is stupid. she still cares for whatever things that gotto do with ian lo.
this evening after my dinner break with ah feng, a quite good looking guy, i overheard a short conversation between andrew and him. andrew told ah feng that ian will be going home around 730pm. cause overtime. they have lotsa things to do and prepare for tomorrow. after then i was thinking of him for quite a long time until he punched out around eight oclock. if back then, i'd tell him to rest more, drink more water and take good care of himself before he went off. and now.... i said nothing. i cant say anything. i dont have the stand to say all these either. can only worry him without his acknowledgement. maybe... will remember him in my prayer at times.-_-"
i like the song 'cant stop a river'. especially the lyrics. a sentence or two before the song ends is nice.
........... cant stop a river from flowing to a sea.. cant stop my heart from loving you....
aha~
gotta stop here. tata... nitey nitez all... everyone in this wonderful world!!
God bless....^_-
May 22, 2008
chocolate indulgence
*day 2 after the break up*
today's on afternoon shift. guess what.....
i woke up around 10sth agAIN.*applause please*
after bathed, had a little bit lunch. didnt eat much. i'm off no appetite to eat still. mum bought chicken rice. only managed to eat 1/3 of it. then went pumped petrol and paid mum's handphone bill.
oya! today's 22nd of may. guess when did i last pump RM50 of petrol. ehee....
it's 28th of APRIL!!!! whoooooooOO....
me keng le....?*clap clap* cause i seldom go anywhere mer... only to and fro to working place nia nia..^_-
after all the hustle and bustle, went work. arrived around 35min earlier with my long lost smile.=D saw ian. today's supposed to be his off day. he's there to accompany his supervisor for lunch i guess. then at nite around 9sth he went agAIN. whatever..... dont feel like to care much d also. pretended didnt see him either. aha~
colleagues asked how's the break up happened. i illustrated it as if i was telling someone's story. no longer feel like crying d.
wherever i went, whoever i met, i smiled at them. except for those bitches and backstabber. ^_- many curious why am i so happy.. i just smiled.^^
i miss secret recipe's chocolate indulgence lar....... mami arRRRRRRRR............T_____T
i no longer crazy after big apple's doughnut liao.....
me want secret recipe's chocolate indulgence!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
==========================================
my big ko ko flying off back to kl tomorrow... 1245pm de flight. hmm... cant have a meet up tim.
saw a long lost friend. michael liu!!! ehee.... anather university's student back to kuching for holiday. hmm.... made me miss schooling days nia nia... sien.
*no matter how much i miss those days, i still have to find a way to let go off them,eventhough it hurts. i still love him. but i cant let ppl know it through my face.*
today's on afternoon shift. guess what.....
i woke up around 10sth agAIN.*applause please*
after bathed, had a little bit lunch. didnt eat much. i'm off no appetite to eat still. mum bought chicken rice. only managed to eat 1/3 of it. then went pumped petrol and paid mum's handphone bill.
oya! today's 22nd of may. guess when did i last pump RM50 of petrol. ehee....
it's 28th of APRIL!!!! whoooooooOO....
me keng le....?*clap clap* cause i seldom go anywhere mer... only to and fro to working place nia nia..^_-
after all the hustle and bustle, went work. arrived around 35min earlier with my long lost smile.=D saw ian. today's supposed to be his off day. he's there to accompany his supervisor for lunch i guess. then at nite around 9sth he went agAIN. whatever..... dont feel like to care much d also. pretended didnt see him either. aha~
colleagues asked how's the break up happened. i illustrated it as if i was telling someone's story. no longer feel like crying d.
wherever i went, whoever i met, i smiled at them. except for those bitches and backstabber. ^_- many curious why am i so happy.. i just smiled.^^
i miss secret recipe's chocolate indulgence lar....... mami arRRRRRRRR............T_____T
i no longer crazy after big apple's doughnut liao.....
me want secret recipe's chocolate indulgence!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
==========================================
my big ko ko flying off back to kl tomorrow... 1245pm de flight. hmm... cant have a meet up tim.
saw a long lost friend. michael liu!!! ehee.... anather university's student back to kuching for holiday. hmm.... made me miss schooling days nia nia... sien.
*no matter how much i miss those days, i still have to find a way to let go off them,eventhough it hurts. i still love him. but i cant let ppl know it through my face.*
May 21, 2008
big ko ko...
*day 1 after the break up*
woke up with swollen eyes agAIN this morning. friends, no worries. not because i cried, but because i piah dvd until around three this morning. 'heart of greed'. 'tang xin feng bao' in mandarin. ehee... baru managed to finish the last episode just now. a nice drama. i love the ending. well well.. the whole story is interesting. people, it's a must watch. aha~
hmmm.... didnt manage to go for a movie today.*sob sob* after a drink with lin and zining at da light around 130pm, carpark of star there full. so........... beh jadi lor....T_____T went visit eboon when passed by travillion. had a short talk.. me and zining then went springie. agAIN... blek..=p went padini to exchange the top i bought tat day with sth special. broad smile i had when walking into padini. after all the hustle and bustle, secret recipe was our next station. i ordered cakes while zining had fish and chips. cakes cakes... wanted to have cakes when having lunch yesterday, but then i brought lunch box. i ordered THREE pieces of cakes. namely chocolate indulgence, chocolate cheese and mango delight. wheeeheee.... but chocolate cheese super sweet. didnt finish that three pieces of cakes. left 1/6 of chocolate cheese, 1/3 of chocolate indulgence and 1/4 of mango delight. wat a waste hor... apa nak buat? couldnt finish mer.. i'm super keng today. whole day i only had that three pieces of cakes. cause wat..
woke up around 10sth this morning. lunch didnt have appetite. after home around 6pm still full with the cakes so skipped dinner.XD not that i didnt have proper meal cause i'm sad arrrrr... just simply dont have appetite to eat.^^
after secret recipe, went padini agAIN to check my shift for tomorrow. ian was not around by that time. then went the face shop to spend money. bought two bottles of nail polish. yeah, TWO bottles. ehee... when got out from there, saw ian around. zining said she wanna have a look on him. so she went in agAIN.
'u sure u wont regret for breaking up with him?', she asked after walked out from the store.
cause ian's engtau she said.
people, not that i wont regret. right from the beginning, i didnt want a break up. i gave him the chance to say break. it's ME who gave him the chance. for i love him, so i dont want to say break.
'you dump him better than he dump you,' that's what ehren said.
i'm supposed to be the one who said break. not that little brat. it should be ME, sarah tan who asked for a break. should be ME!
saw teckshin back from toilet at the same time, asked for the RM2 that he owed me. actually wanna go back to the store facing ian with a smile, just to show him that me, sarah tan, still can live a happy life without him.
waited outside the store. then saw ian and andrew went toilet. i didnt take a look at him. joked around with zining instead. laughing happily.
i know i was just pretending. i've got no choice. i cant let him see that sarah tan is bleeding inside. no,i cant! i have to let him know that i can live happily without him. i have to let him know that!
tomorrow will be going for work. sarah tan must always wear a smile on her face. even facing the bitchy supervisor and S.A. sarah tan still has to be patient. i've lost the person i love. i cant lost my own intergrity.
speaked a lot to zining on the way home. felt like crying, but i've got no more tears to flow...
he's not of worth for me to cry and love him. i know all these. i know it...
anyways, God will bless me and bring me through all these eventhough i still love him. AMEN!
==========================================
woke up around 8sth after home. tooO tired. plus plus long didnt have a nap. saw a text when woke up. guess it was from who.....
NEO ZHI YUAN!!!!!! aha~
i thought i saw wrong name at first. when i saw properly at the nick agAIN.. no mistake. it's 'big brother' in mandarin. it's neo zhi yuan. ehee...
long didnt have a chat with him looO... thought he changed his number d....
had a long chat. about two hours plus. hehe.. chatted lotsa things...=D
it's good to chat with him.^^
woke up with swollen eyes agAIN this morning. friends, no worries. not because i cried, but because i piah dvd until around three this morning. 'heart of greed'. 'tang xin feng bao' in mandarin. ehee... baru managed to finish the last episode just now. a nice drama. i love the ending. well well.. the whole story is interesting. people, it's a must watch. aha~
hmmm.... didnt manage to go for a movie today.*sob sob* after a drink with lin and zining at da light around 130pm, carpark of star there full. so........... beh jadi lor....T_____T went visit eboon when passed by travillion. had a short talk.. me and zining then went springie. agAIN... blek..=p went padini to exchange the top i bought tat day with sth special. broad smile i had when walking into padini. after all the hustle and bustle, secret recipe was our next station. i ordered cakes while zining had fish and chips. cakes cakes... wanted to have cakes when having lunch yesterday, but then i brought lunch box. i ordered THREE pieces of cakes. namely chocolate indulgence, chocolate cheese and mango delight. wheeeheee.... but chocolate cheese super sweet. didnt finish that three pieces of cakes. left 1/6 of chocolate cheese, 1/3 of chocolate indulgence and 1/4 of mango delight. wat a waste hor... apa nak buat? couldnt finish mer.. i'm super keng today. whole day i only had that three pieces of cakes. cause wat..
woke up around 10sth this morning. lunch didnt have appetite. after home around 6pm still full with the cakes so skipped dinner.XD not that i didnt have proper meal cause i'm sad arrrrr... just simply dont have appetite to eat.^^
after secret recipe, went padini agAIN to check my shift for tomorrow. ian was not around by that time. then went the face shop to spend money. bought two bottles of nail polish. yeah, TWO bottles. ehee... when got out from there, saw ian around. zining said she wanna have a look on him. so she went in agAIN.
'u sure u wont regret for breaking up with him?', she asked after walked out from the store.
cause ian's engtau she said.
people, not that i wont regret. right from the beginning, i didnt want a break up. i gave him the chance to say break. it's ME who gave him the chance. for i love him, so i dont want to say break.
'you dump him better than he dump you,' that's what ehren said.
i'm supposed to be the one who said break. not that little brat. it should be ME, sarah tan who asked for a break. should be ME!
saw teckshin back from toilet at the same time, asked for the RM2 that he owed me. actually wanna go back to the store facing ian with a smile, just to show him that me, sarah tan, still can live a happy life without him.
waited outside the store. then saw ian and andrew went toilet. i didnt take a look at him. joked around with zining instead. laughing happily.
i know i was just pretending. i've got no choice. i cant let him see that sarah tan is bleeding inside. no,i cant! i have to let him know that i can live happily without him. i have to let him know that!
tomorrow will be going for work. sarah tan must always wear a smile on her face. even facing the bitchy supervisor and S.A. sarah tan still has to be patient. i've lost the person i love. i cant lost my own intergrity.
speaked a lot to zining on the way home. felt like crying, but i've got no more tears to flow...
he's not of worth for me to cry and love him. i know all these. i know it...
anyways, God will bless me and bring me through all these eventhough i still love him. AMEN!
==========================================
woke up around 8sth after home. tooO tired. plus plus long didnt have a nap. saw a text when woke up. guess it was from who.....
NEO ZHI YUAN!!!!!! aha~
i thought i saw wrong name at first. when i saw properly at the nick agAIN.. no mistake. it's 'big brother' in mandarin. it's neo zhi yuan. ehee...
long didnt have a chat with him looO... thought he changed his number d....
had a long chat. about two hours plus. hehe.. chatted lotsa things...=D
it's good to chat with him.^^
May 20, 2008
announcement
was on morning shift today. ian on full.
5.30pm he punched out for dinner break. 6.30pm i punched out, he punched in. finally managed to catch him for a short talk.
relationship has to be stopped for A moment he said. permenantly is what i think.
reasons for the break up: *correct me if i'm really wrong*
do i deserve to be treated so? i'm earning something more than him. my studies is hell much better than his. i'm going to do architecture. he's just doing a merely diploma in business admin. WTH! people, did i do anything wrong that i deserve to be treated so?*cold laughing*
wont be crying anymore. friends, no worries. God born me to be a strong and tough gurl.
i still love him though.:rofl: i know i'm freakishly stupid. dont have to remind me about that ei...
=======================================
going for narnia tomorrow afternoon with zining. wanna follow? text me before noon tomorrow then. ^_-
5.30pm he punched out for dinner break. 6.30pm i punched out, he punched in. finally managed to catch him for a short talk.
relationship has to be stopped for A moment he said. permenantly is what i think.
reasons for the break up: *correct me if i'm really wrong*
- an incident happened when a S.A asked me to call a customer that his pants was altered. i said no cause the flow of customer was quite big.*member pre sale, imagine that* the next day ehren asked if i had anything to share among the colleagues. i brought up that. after the briefing, that S.A complaint to ian. he said i dont have to call straight away, i can call when i'm free. he thought i'm selfish. he thought.
- padini's floor is very smooth for sliding. and i love to slide, my shoes are smooth, so i can slide. i used to do that when i was in st thom. he said i'm childish. he said.
- days ago when a customer approached him for altered pants, he came over counter, asked me for the pants. he then asked me to fold the pants with a not-so-good tone. mood ruined, i scolded WT. he got angry. he angry.
- he's still thinking of the incident when he fooled around with other gurls in front of me. from then, he had to wear a mask when facing me. according to him, i'm sensitive. according to him.
- he feels stressful. he has to work, study and take care of my feelings. he is stressful, he said.
my explaination: *tell me if i'm searching for excuses*
- counter can be shitty busy. actually pants that S.A altered should be handled by that S.A from the beginning till the customers take the pants. that's their responsiblilty. for me, if i'm the one who altered the pants, i wont get the cashiers to call the customers, instead, i will call them myself. cause that's my responsibility. i'm simply a responsible person.
- i always love to slide. if i'm walking on smooth surface and i dont slide, i'm no longer myself. cause i'm always playful.
- i scolded him WT cause his tone wasnt nice. he should have told me that his brand is lack of manpower and couldnt fold the pants and put them into plastic bags.
- i've let go off those stupid incidents. if i still think of it, sarah tan only can be found in University Sakit Mental no longer after that. i chose to let go. forgive and forget. but he said he couldnt let go cause he had to take care of my feeling. like just now when seed's supervisor used a keychain to hit him, he would think will i get jealous agAIN or not. actually, i didnt even put that in my heart. i've learnt to give in and stay clam.
he didnt reply my texts not that his handphone ran out of credit, he just simply dont want to reply. when confronting him just now, tears nearly flowed down. he then quickly said he dont want to talk all those to me cause he didnt want to see me with tears. i swallowed all my tears and smiled at him throughout the conversation. i SMILED at him! **** his supervisor and colleagues TAUGHT him to stop the relationship for a moment. before going off, i bowed and said thank you and smiled. i've gone alil bit crazy d.*bowing is what i always do. when YLM treated me a lunch, i bowed. that's manner.* ian asked me not to drive fast home. i didnt listen.
met irena, my colleague, the cashier half way. she was heading to the store to punch in. i cried on her shoulder. after her advice, i saw ma ing's sms. turned to city chain to find her. cried agAIN. ma ing asked me to drive safe home. i chose to listen to HER advice. and i was home safe.
it's 20th of may today. 6 weeks plus. we ended.do i deserve to be treated so? i'm earning something more than him. my studies is hell much better than his. i'm going to do architecture. he's just doing a merely diploma in business admin. WTH! people, did i do anything wrong that i deserve to be treated so?*cold laughing*
wont be crying anymore. friends, no worries. God born me to be a strong and tough gurl.
i still love him though.:rofl: i know i'm freakishly stupid. dont have to remind me about that ei...
=======================================
going for narnia tomorrow afternoon with zining. wanna follow? text me before noon tomorrow then. ^_-
May 19, 2008
record broken
on full shift today. tired.....
half way working, my waist ached like nuts. couldnt stand straight.*same, old problem* after bearing it for few hours, wore my off duty tag and off i went to the supermarket to buy painkiller. actually the painkiller has to be eaten 2capsules at a time every 4-5hours. but i had only one at a time.*cause i forgotten to read the instruction* painkiller memang painkiller, i was able to stand straight after an hour or so. hehe...
BUT!!!!
around 5sth in the afternoon, my waist aching like nuts agAIN. one more painkiller i had. okay till now. lol...
first time i took two painkiller. normally i dont. only during class when i cant bear the pain. i broke my own record.*applause please*
the universities students are like banduan baru dilepas dari penjara. can see lotsa familiar faces around springie SHOPPING. ****. long didnt go shopping lor... swiped my debit card without hesitation on the first day of the member pre sales. bought myself a sure-luntur-warna necklace, two sleeveless tee and a tee for mum and bro each. didnt dare to buy other shirts. cause most of the time i'll only be wearing UNIFORM! WT... feel so sorry for myself. cause long didnt dress up myself nicely lerh...x_x
U6S3'07 of st thomas.. i saw our loh bong just now. guess he was with who...
DA DANG....
Phekchia. oooooooooOOOO....
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.... dont throw slippers on me if u all knew it before me kay? cause it's been a long long time since my antaenna last functioned. paiseh....=p
==============================================
planned to sort things out tonight actually. but my darling didnt reply my texts. so... failed to do so.
no more breakfast, no more lunch break, no more dinner break, no more picking up and sending off. he no longer bother to ask what's my break time of the day and my shift on the next day. didnt even tell me that he had his lunch break at 1pm just now. just walked passed the counter as if i'm invisible. my heart really broken. it pains. it hurts. i didnt know how to get angry anymore. the only thing i know is pain and sad and tears. held my tears tho. didnt have it roll down my cheeks. didnt want ehren to see me cry. i feel like he looks more like a couple with his supervisor than me. although his supervisor has a fiancee d. but people u know what..... they go break together, he shared everything with her. his problems, his laughters. he shared his schedule to his supervisor and collegues. instead of me.=(
friends, i know he's not worth of my tears. i know i've got to let go. but... i just couldnt help crying. just couldnt help loving him. i'm always eveready for a break up if he wanted since the first day i'm together with him. i'm prepared. i just couldnt stop loving him.
my heart softened after few hours. thinking that he might be tooOOO tired for a talk.
i dont know. the only thing i know is i'm super duper terribly vegetably STUPID. and tat's it.
i miss those days............................................................
half way working, my waist ached like nuts. couldnt stand straight.*same, old problem* after bearing it for few hours, wore my off duty tag and off i went to the supermarket to buy painkiller. actually the painkiller has to be eaten 2capsules at a time every 4-5hours. but i had only one at a time.*cause i forgotten to read the instruction* painkiller memang painkiller, i was able to stand straight after an hour or so. hehe...
BUT!!!!
around 5sth in the afternoon, my waist aching like nuts agAIN. one more painkiller i had. okay till now. lol...
first time i took two painkiller. normally i dont. only during class when i cant bear the pain. i broke my own record.*applause please*
the universities students are like banduan baru dilepas dari penjara. can see lotsa familiar faces around springie SHOPPING. ****. long didnt go shopping lor... swiped my debit card without hesitation on the first day of the member pre sales. bought myself a sure-luntur-warna necklace, two sleeveless tee and a tee for mum and bro each. didnt dare to buy other shirts. cause most of the time i'll only be wearing UNIFORM! WT... feel so sorry for myself. cause long didnt dress up myself nicely lerh...x_x
U6S3'07 of st thomas.. i saw our loh bong just now. guess he was with who...
DA DANG....
Phekchia. oooooooooOOOO....
aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.... dont throw slippers on me if u all knew it before me kay? cause it's been a long long time since my antaenna last functioned. paiseh....=p
==============================================
planned to sort things out tonight actually. but my darling didnt reply my texts. so... failed to do so.
no more breakfast, no more lunch break, no more dinner break, no more picking up and sending off. he no longer bother to ask what's my break time of the day and my shift on the next day. didnt even tell me that he had his lunch break at 1pm just now. just walked passed the counter as if i'm invisible. my heart really broken. it pains. it hurts. i didnt know how to get angry anymore. the only thing i know is pain and sad and tears. held my tears tho. didnt have it roll down my cheeks. didnt want ehren to see me cry. i feel like he looks more like a couple with his supervisor than me. although his supervisor has a fiancee d. but people u know what..... they go break together, he shared everything with her. his problems, his laughters. he shared his schedule to his supervisor and collegues. instead of me.=(
friends, i know he's not worth of my tears. i know i've got to let go. but... i just couldnt help crying. just couldnt help loving him. i'm always eveready for a break up if he wanted since the first day i'm together with him. i'm prepared. i just couldnt stop loving him.
my heart softened after few hours. thinking that he might be tooOOO tired for a talk.
i dont know. the only thing i know is i'm super duper terribly vegetably STUPID. and tat's it.
i miss those days............................................................
May 18, 2008
god's gracious
i miss the memories. i miss everything.
how many nights do i have to spend hiding myself under my blanket crying?
how many days do i have to spend to go work in the morning with my swollen eyes?
tonight is the second night i hide myself under my blanket crying. went working with my swollen eyes this morning....
tears stopped when typing this anyway.
when i wanted to rest just now, my heart suddenly sanked, tears just non-stop flowing, because of him. then i asked lord, "where have i done wrong to deserve all these? how many nights do i have to cry over such thing?" and guess what happened seconds later.............................
elizabeth's text came in, telling me to cheer up.
then i know, Lord wants sarah tan to cheer up always. there's always a reason why i'm a saggitarius. Lord God just want me to be a happy baby.
so...................
I have to stop all my tears and think of nothing but to praise the Lord! people, God is real. never doubt that.
================================================
actually wanted to post about the member pre sales that padini is having now. seems like i've got to postpone it.
once again, God is real. he's so real that he asked elizbeth to cheer me up when my tears was flowing for one or two minutes.
how many nights do i have to spend hiding myself under my blanket crying?
how many days do i have to spend to go work in the morning with my swollen eyes?
tonight is the second night i hide myself under my blanket crying. went working with my swollen eyes this morning....
tears stopped when typing this anyway.
when i wanted to rest just now, my heart suddenly sanked, tears just non-stop flowing, because of him. then i asked lord, "where have i done wrong to deserve all these? how many nights do i have to cry over such thing?" and guess what happened seconds later.............................
elizabeth's text came in, telling me to cheer up.
then i know, Lord wants sarah tan to cheer up always. there's always a reason why i'm a saggitarius. Lord God just want me to be a happy baby.
so...................
I have to stop all my tears and think of nothing but to praise the Lord! people, God is real. never doubt that.
================================================
actually wanted to post about the member pre sales that padini is having now. seems like i've got to postpone it.
once again, God is real. he's so real that he asked elizbeth to cheer me up when my tears was flowing for one or two minutes.
May 17, 2008
who needs blood
*buuuuuuhuuuuuuuuu....* so so so tired lar... sigh.
hmmm... finally made an effort to go take my blood test report. thank God...... nothing goes wrong with my body.*praise the Lord!! clap clap* all green lights! wheeeeheeeee... something alil abnormal with my body parts is my liver. guess what..............
the total protein in my liver is HIGHER than the normal one!:rofl: the upper boundary is 82 while mine is 83!*laugh out loud*
i dont have the hept A antibody. the doctor asked me to have an injection. and also the what ovari cancer vaccin.
once sarah tan heard the word 'injection'.........
i nearly lari lintang pukang lerh.. wat? wanna train me to be immune to injection har? wait long long kay?XD
oyea, not to forget to tell you all something important oso.
*beep*
sarah tan is an UNIVERSAL donor!!!*glory to the Almighty ones* my blood type: O positive
but.............................
although i'm an universal donor.... i'm underweight. means.... i cant really donate blood to the needy. wait harrrrr.... wait me gain my weight first. or... i go cheat the doctors on duty during any blood donatin campaign that i'm of the standard weight then i'll go donate my blood. hehe....i'm proud to be an universal donor!!^^ my blood very good also. got hept B antibody bor..... hehe...
erm erm... i'm an organ donor too! but too bad.. i've lost the organ donor card. anyone knows how to get one? hmm.....
told u guys before.. sarah tan super 'ho sim' *read in hokkien* one... teeheehee....
my hair.... weird to me. but hope that i'll be the pioneer. *i.e. people around will have almost the same hairstyle no longer after me. blek* cause i felt weirdy lerh.... those saw it, very weird and short hor? esp my fringe and the side hair.~_~"
HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!!!!! i miss my teachers............ esp my primary six ones. long didnt go san xiao liao...T.T
hmmm... finally made an effort to go take my blood test report. thank God...... nothing goes wrong with my body.*praise the Lord!! clap clap* all green lights! wheeeeheeeee... something alil abnormal with my body parts is my liver. guess what..............
the total protein in my liver is HIGHER than the normal one!:rofl: the upper boundary is 82 while mine is 83!*laugh out loud*
i dont have the hept A antibody. the doctor asked me to have an injection. and also the what ovari cancer vaccin.
once sarah tan heard the word 'injection'.........
i nearly lari lintang pukang lerh.. wat? wanna train me to be immune to injection har? wait long long kay?XD
oyea, not to forget to tell you all something important oso.
*beep*
sarah tan is an UNIVERSAL donor!!!*glory to the Almighty ones* my blood type: O positive
but.............................
although i'm an universal donor.... i'm underweight. means.... i cant really donate blood to the needy. wait harrrrr.... wait me gain my weight first. or... i go cheat the doctors on duty during any blood donatin campaign that i'm of the standard weight then i'll go donate my blood. hehe....i'm proud to be an universal donor!!^^ my blood very good also. got hept B antibody bor..... hehe...
erm erm... i'm an organ donor too! but too bad.. i've lost the organ donor card. anyone knows how to get one? hmm.....
told u guys before.. sarah tan super 'ho sim' *read in hokkien* one... teeheehee....
my hair.... weird to me. but hope that i'll be the pioneer. *i.e. people around will have almost the same hairstyle no longer after me. blek* cause i felt weirdy lerh.... those saw it, very weird and short hor? esp my fringe and the side hair.~_~"
HAPPY TEACHERS' DAY!!!!!! i miss my teachers............ esp my primary six ones. long didnt go san xiao liao...T.T
May 16, 2008
gaining strength in Christ
the most heartbreaking thing in the life
isnt being rejected by someone u love
but being treated coldly by ur lover
it really hurts alot... *no joke*
you love that person so much
yet he/she still treats you
colder than the temperature
when salt is added to ice.
********
sarah's heart is so strong that it can be broken for a few times in A single day.*applause please*
so people, sarah tan is opened for HURTS as she gains strength from her precious Father Lord.
whoever knows me well, can do me a favour? list down the bad things about me. pleaseeEEEEE..... let me know through the comment part.
oya, sarah tan needs someone to talk to. whoever read this and think that u're kind enough, please give her a call or ask her out for a drink when she's free. thanks lot!^^
May 14, 2008
cut
didnt make it to take my blood test report. cheated mum that the report wasnt out yet. but actually i dunno whether the report is out or not.-____-
as if i have a lot of hair to cut. i'll have a major hair cut almost every month recently.
mum dragged me to go uncle richard's place after had lunch at After Three. for a new hairstyle, she said. didnt want to do so de.. cause didnt have any hairstyle in my mind. but, still went to tun jugah in the end. so.......... after more than half an hour uncle richard cut my hair.............
i've got a new hairstyle!!!! woooohooooooo......
truly new hairstyle. which i never thought of it before and never dare to try de.. lol... uncle richard very keng ler... didnt tell him what shape i want and he just had his nice time there cut and cut and cut. but i kesian him lor... he had to get a stool to sit down when cutting my hair.*my hair is no-joke thick!* :rofl: hope that ehren wont laugh at me for that when he saw me tomorrow.x_x
and............
the first one who saw my new hairstyle was................................
my first crush!! instead of my darling. booooohoooo...=D didnt think of meeting him at tun jugah. only thought of him weeks ago nia nia... well.. uni students are having their break. so he came back for holidays from UKM. he's working at G2000. the same old him. still that handsome. only the hairstyle is much different. longer. oooooooOOOO.... hehe...
wanna see how do i look like with my new hairstyle? well... drop by padini then.^^
as if i have a lot of hair to cut. i'll have a major hair cut almost every month recently.
mum dragged me to go uncle richard's place after had lunch at After Three. for a new hairstyle, she said. didnt want to do so de.. cause didnt have any hairstyle in my mind. but, still went to tun jugah in the end. so.......... after more than half an hour uncle richard cut my hair.............
i've got a new hairstyle!!!! woooohooooooo......
truly new hairstyle. which i never thought of it before and never dare to try de.. lol... uncle richard very keng ler... didnt tell him what shape i want and he just had his nice time there cut and cut and cut. but i kesian him lor... he had to get a stool to sit down when cutting my hair.*my hair is no-joke thick!* :rofl: hope that ehren wont laugh at me for that when he saw me tomorrow.x_x
and............
the first one who saw my new hairstyle was................................
my first crush!! instead of my darling. booooohoooo...=D didnt think of meeting him at tun jugah. only thought of him weeks ago nia nia... well.. uni students are having their break. so he came back for holidays from UKM. he's working at G2000. the same old him. still that handsome. only the hairstyle is much different. longer. oooooooOOOO.... hehe...
wanna see how do i look like with my new hairstyle? well... drop by padini then.^^
May 13, 2008
lame
uni students are having their holidays. saw fletcher at springie with his friend.*well..he didnt see me of cause* then saw some familiar faces in padini after my lunch break. they're either ex highians or ex thomians. couldnt differentiate also.
tend to spent alot on food these days. if on full shift, will have to spent about RM10 per day. food there d*** mahal lar... mum seldom prepare me lunch box also... wonder if the budget of RM250 i gave myself for food is enough for this month not. mind u all... ONLY food. no other than that. hardly go shopping these days, so dont have to spent. siGHHHHHHHHH............
blood test report out in these two days. should i go take it tomorrow or on thursday? if tomorrow, will be going with mum and bro. if thursday, will be on my own. then no one will know what's wrong with me. except me and my doctor. and not to forget, my readers too! hehe... when should i go??????
===================================================
my darling not feeling well. and guess what.....
i knew it from other people's mouth!!!!
how 'great' is sarah tan!!!
i memang dunno what to do. told him before, if there's anything, must tell me. people, i felt lame and stupid when the whole world was asking if my darling's sick not and i knew nothing about it.=( i felt vegetable-ly lame when others told me that my darling's not feeling well. confronted him and asked what happened to him.. guess what i got after few questions.........
"go out and work. i'm not in a good mood now."
and this is what i told fadzril----> "buat baik dibalas jahat"
bad mood when i got back to the counter. seconds later, there was a bunch of youngsters asking for vacancy in chinese. i've gotto entertain them. tears rolled when i wanted to talk to them. in front of them, sarah tan cried! i felt so not pro at all.. luckily ehren wasnt there. dont dare to imagine what would happen if he's there. colleague shocked when i cried, trying their best to stop me from crying as there are cctv around.
this is the first time that a guy raises his voice on me. no guy around me ever raises his voice on me before. eboon, there were 21guys in our class. think, whoever raises his vice on me?!!
and now, my darling is the first. 'great' huh?
i never cried over the same incident twice in a day before. my darling breaks my record agAIN.
now i know.. being caring is also a mistake. sarah tan raises white flag. i fail to be his gurl. i'm so terribly vegetable-ly LAME!
tend to spent alot on food these days. if on full shift, will have to spent about RM10 per day. food there d*** mahal lar... mum seldom prepare me lunch box also... wonder if the budget of RM250 i gave myself for food is enough for this month not. mind u all... ONLY food. no other than that. hardly go shopping these days, so dont have to spent. siGHHHHHHHHH............
blood test report out in these two days. should i go take it tomorrow or on thursday? if tomorrow, will be going with mum and bro. if thursday, will be on my own. then no one will know what's wrong with me. except me and my doctor. and not to forget, my readers too! hehe... when should i go??????
===================================================
my darling not feeling well. and guess what.....
i knew it from other people's mouth!!!!
how 'great' is sarah tan!!!
i memang dunno what to do. told him before, if there's anything, must tell me. people, i felt lame and stupid when the whole world was asking if my darling's sick not and i knew nothing about it.=( i felt vegetable-ly lame when others told me that my darling's not feeling well. confronted him and asked what happened to him.. guess what i got after few questions.........
"go out and work. i'm not in a good mood now."
and this is what i told fadzril----> "buat baik dibalas jahat"
bad mood when i got back to the counter. seconds later, there was a bunch of youngsters asking for vacancy in chinese. i've gotto entertain them. tears rolled when i wanted to talk to them. in front of them, sarah tan cried! i felt so not pro at all.. luckily ehren wasnt there. dont dare to imagine what would happen if he's there. colleague shocked when i cried, trying their best to stop me from crying as there are cctv around.
this is the first time that a guy raises his voice on me. no guy around me ever raises his voice on me before. eboon, there were 21guys in our class. think, whoever raises his vice on me?!!
and now, my darling is the first. 'great' huh?
i never cried over the same incident twice in a day before. my darling breaks my record agAIN.
now i know.. being caring is also a mistake. sarah tan raises white flag. i fail to be his gurl. i'm so terribly vegetable-ly LAME!
May 11, 2008
happy mothers' day!!
its again mothers' day.
put the present in front of mum's room door by 0030 this morning after online-ing. hehe....
it's sth stupid i bought from the body shop at jusco. a lotion and body wash, lavender scented. hehe....
gonna go for work later. typing this at springie. borrow wifi from starbucks. big apple's line kinda weak. blurb...........
nth much to blog about.
today is me and my darling's one month anni. he didnt remember i guess.. tho i told him bt a week ago. so..... nth special will be on going.
wanna go dinner with mum lerh... but have to work. sigh......-______________-"
May 10, 2008
stoned
conflict with mum. tomorrow's mother's day. thought can change my shift to morning. but colleague also wanna celebrate. so beh jadi change it to morning shift.
guess what did my mum say when i said i cant change my shift...
"U memang stone hearted larh...." then she there nagged and nagged and nagged....................
walau ei.................................
as if..... if me the manager sure change lar.. ngaiti... colleague cant change with me then i'm stone hearted? WT.....................
asked Kelvin*anather OE* if me can have UPL tomorrow with the reason mothers' day.[alright people, i thought of having UNPAID LEAVE kay? if this still counted stone hearted i oso bo bien liao..]
guess what did he answer...
"ha ha ha....." *mind u.. it's not the real laugh o... it's evil laugh -_____________-*
sigh... i oso dunno wat to do liao....=(
ouh God.... teach me.. teach me what to do...
guess what did my mum say when i said i cant change my shift...
"U memang stone hearted larh...." then she there nagged and nagged and nagged....................
walau ei.................................
as if..... if me the manager sure change lar.. ngaiti... colleague cant change with me then i'm stone hearted? WT.....................
asked Kelvin*anather OE* if me can have UPL tomorrow with the reason mothers' day.[alright people, i thought of having UNPAID LEAVE kay? if this still counted stone hearted i oso bo bien liao..]
guess what did he answer...
"ha ha ha....." *mind u.. it's not the real laugh o... it's evil laugh -_____________-*
sigh... i oso dunno wat to do liao....=(
ouh God.... teach me.. teach me what to do...
May 9, 2008
糟糕
這是在5月7日所發生的事：
今天本該是我的工作休息日，為了你，我甘心換成隔天才休息。你沒有一絲感激吧，我想。
心情原先已經並不怎麼好了。昨晚，那騷貨竟在我面前和你胡鬧！你也附和，毫不顧慮我的感受。
下午一点多。。。。。。。。。
恰恰正是顧客不多的時間。和你小聊了一下，並提起昨晚所發生的事。陳淑燕再憋着讓苦水往肚里吞，她会抓狂。
你聽了，反應極大。走前，丟下了 “醬下去，很難”的一句話。我呆了。在櫃台那兒，我楞了。頓時，切切實實的感受到何謂心碎。淚珠子不住的流。。。在櫃台前，我哭了。。。就因你那句話。
同事讓我別再哭，洗把臉或喝口水。我不依。
顧客還錢，嘴角虽往上揚＊畢竟那是工作時間，是我的本份＊，但臉上的淚痕還在。。。。
午餐時間。。。你說了好多。你說我如此的反應是因為我不信任你。先生!你讓我怎麼相信你啊？？依舊有人問起你我的事，但你卻說我倆是兄妹。你讓淑燕我該如何信你呢？
你讓我吃午餐。我不依。理由為我早餐吃的飽，事實是陳淑燕沒胃口，吃不下。
總覺得你似乎有許多事情瞞着我。我倒希望是我多疑。。。我希望我可以不管你，給予你十足的自由，但我辦不到。當陳淑燕不再管你，對於你所作的事情不聞不問，其他的女生和你胡鬧我也悶不坑聲時。。。你得打起十二分精神。。因為那將時陳淑燕只把你當成再也普通不過的普通朋友。
我本以為我並不愛你，因為見到你時我並沒有那心跳加速的感覺。日子久了，我也越來越依賴你。原來感情是可以培養的。。。
或許。。。陳淑燕不懂的該如何當個稱職的女朋友吧。。所以我才会有如此的反應。
我和你。。。。会有未來麼？
好想念人間茶紡的麻辣面。陳淑燕心情超爛！！！
單身的人們，還是單身好。。沒煩惱。
May 8, 2008
nth special
off day again. darling had class in the afternoon. so did nth much.
of blood test:
mum went healthcare clinic there to let the doctor reads her blood test report. after she had her hepatitis A+B injection, she asked me to have a blood test........
WALAUA..................
BLOOD TEST???????
INJECTION LAGI???????
mami arRRR.... oh my God arRRR....
well.. if you all read my oldBlog before, you'll know how much i fear of having injection.x_x told my mum that i had some toblerone this morning *thinking that i might be able to escape from having the needle to suck my blood.*
BUT...........................
the doctor said it's okay. it wont affect much but only the blood sugar part. *sheeeeEEEsh...teruk betul the doctor..*
at last i still had the blood test. T_____________T
i kept talking with my mum,thinking that it might help alil in drawing my attention not to think of the pain. still, it's in vain. i knew it when the needle started to poke through my skin. i felt the pain when the needle sucked my blood.
CHEK AK lar..............
sarah tan d of low blood pressure and having alil anemia yet the doctor still get THREE bottles of my blood.. *faint* [sarah tan is now lack of blood. pity me,people.XD]
after the process... my feeling was...............
erm... still okay lerh....
ear piercing is MUCH MORE vegetable-ly painful than having the doctor get my blood.:lol:
hope the report will have all green lights instead of red lights. but then... it seems to be an unreachable hope x_x firstly, my red/white blood cells quantity sure very low. then i tend to get gastric very easily. my stomach part sure got sth wrong ler... then bla bla bla... dunno which part of my body goes wrong oso.... sigggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
ouh God... have mercy on sarah tan.
================================================
MrYap, thanx for the drink at colours this afternoon ei.... hehe...
went springie after all the hustle and bustle. queued for Big Apple doughnuts. didnt have a long queue. only about five min nia nia... thank God... it wasnt a peak time. hehe...
Big Apple doughnuts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sarah tan is CRAZY after you!!!!!!!!!*stretching out hands for the unreachable*
sarah tan underweight ei.... blurb...
of blood test:
mum went healthcare clinic there to let the doctor reads her blood test report. after she had her hepatitis A+B injection, she asked me to have a blood test........
WALAUA..................
BLOOD TEST???????
INJECTION LAGI???????
mami arRRR.... oh my God arRRR....
well.. if you all read my oldBlog before, you'll know how much i fear of having injection.x_x told my mum that i had some toblerone this morning *thinking that i might be able to escape from having the needle to suck my blood.*
BUT...........................
the doctor said it's okay. it wont affect much but only the blood sugar part. *sheeeeEEEsh...teruk betul the doctor..*
at last i still had the blood test. T_____________T
i kept talking with my mum,thinking that it might help alil in drawing my attention not to think of the pain. still, it's in vain. i knew it when the needle started to poke through my skin. i felt the pain when the needle sucked my blood.
CHEK AK lar..............
sarah tan d of low blood pressure and having alil anemia yet the doctor still get THREE bottles of my blood.. *faint* [sarah tan is now lack of blood. pity me,people.XD]
after the process... my feeling was...............
erm... still okay lerh....
ear piercing is MUCH MORE vegetable-ly painful than having the doctor get my blood.:lol:
hope the report will have all green lights instead of red lights. but then... it seems to be an unreachable hope x_x firstly, my red/white blood cells quantity sure very low. then i tend to get gastric very easily. my stomach part sure got sth wrong ler... then bla bla bla... dunno which part of my body goes wrong oso.... sigggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
ouh God... have mercy on sarah tan.
================================================
MrYap, thanx for the drink at colours this afternoon ei.... hehe...
went springie after all the hustle and bustle. queued for Big Apple doughnuts. didnt have a long queue. only about five min nia nia... thank God... it wasnt a peak time. hehe...
Big Apple doughnuts!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! sarah tan is CRAZY after you!!!!!!!!!*stretching out hands for the unreachable*
sarah tan underweight ei.... blurb...
May 7, 2008
bitches
a BITCH and a SLAT makes a PERFECT match.
why do i have to care so much?
why do i have to be angry?
made millions of my body cells dead nia nia..
when sarah tan no longer care.........................
people,
BEWARE!!
u all will receive a message saying "danger!!danger!!*beep beep*"
i wish i wont be caring much.
but.... am i able to do so?
sarah tan is no longer sarah tan........
people........
sarah tan wants to be the old her.
tat is to be a happy baby everyday...
anyone can help her?
i miss the old me.............T.T
tomorrow's my off day........... nothing special going on. except for meeting up MrYap in the afternoon.
why care?
meet lotsa bitchs. WTH....why do i have to care so much?
why do i have to be angry?
made millions of my body cells dead nia nia..
when sarah tan no longer care.........................
people,
BEWARE!!
u all will receive a message saying "danger!!danger!!*beep beep*"
i wish i wont be caring much.
but.... am i able to do so?
sarah tan is no longer sarah tan........
people........
sarah tan wants to be the old her.
tat is to be a happy baby everyday...
anyone can help her?
i miss the old me.............T.T
tomorrow's my off day........... nothing special going on. except for meeting up MrYap in the afternoon.
May 5, 2008
lesson
Lesson of the day:
there's no need to care so much if none will appreciate it.
*MUST be digested by sarah tan!!!*
being moody is tiring.
sarah is tired
tired of being moody.
sarah wanna be a happy baby everyday!!!!!!!!!!!
sarah doesnt want to be moody!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's much more better to love Lord God..................
there's no need to care so much if none will appreciate it.
*MUST be digested by sarah tan!!!*
==============
being moody is tiring.
sarah is tired
tired of being moody.
sarah wanna be a happy baby everyday!!!!!!!!!!!
sarah doesnt want to be moody!!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's much more better to love Lord God..................
May 4, 2008
tiRED
i miss schooling days
where i can fight with guys around
and share all the laughters
and scoldings together with my classmates.
i miss those days...........................
====================================================
some songs to share------> Total Eclipse of The Heart--Westlife and Amazed by duncan james i guess. hehe.... worth listening.
TIRED
guess wat... on full shift tomorrow. full shift on monday. wat a joke! monday ei... u think people will go shopping on monday hia..... ngaiti... saturday and sunday nite d shopped sepuas-puas hatinya still got people go shopping on monday meh.... haizzzzzZZZZZZZ
=======================================================
happy 20th burfdae,elizabeth!
happy 21st, ee liang!
may God bless u all abundantly!
where i can fight with guys around
and share all the laughters
and scoldings together with my classmates.
i miss those days...........................
====================================================
some songs to share------> Total Eclipse of The Heart--Westlife and Amazed by duncan james i guess. hehe.... worth listening.
TIRED
guess wat... on full shift tomorrow. full shift on monday. wat a joke! monday ei... u think people will go shopping on monday hia..... ngaiti... saturday and sunday nite d shopped sepuas-puas hatinya still got people go shopping on monday meh.... haizzzzzZZZZZZZ
=======================================================
happy 20th burfdae,elizabeth!
happy 21st, ee liang!
may God bless u all abundantly!
May 3, 2008
SAD
most of friends around me would know this:
THREE things i'd do when i'm freakishly sad :-
1. scribbling
2. speeding
3. have a bowl of super hot and spicy noodles.
i did two out of the three this evening --- scribbling and speeding.
sarah is so...................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
SAD.
springie has this stupid idea -- late nite shopping. every first saturday of the month, springie will operate till midnite. so tenants have to operate till midnite as well.
my darling is on full shift today. supposed to be until 10pm. but he wanted to work till 12am cause springie's management will pay RM15 if punched out after 12am. i didnt want him to work till so late. cause he'll be on full shift agAIN tomorrow. dont wanna him to be too tired juz because of that merely RM15. after he insisted to work till midnite, my tone didnt go well when he wanted to take customer's altered pants from me. i'm kinda angry in terms of worrying. he then no mood. didnt even care to inform me when he went for dinner break. i started scribbling when found that he's got no mood. 6.30pm i punched out. speeded all the way home at 80+ km/h. tears fall when i was on my way home.
some more.... mission failed. actually wanted to change off day with fadzril *another O.A* cause my darling will be having class every thursday started this month.*so his off day will ve on thursday* but fadzril also wanna go dating........ so............... failed to switch off day with him.
S
A
D
sorry darling.... for the bad tone.
sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry
==================================================
it's teckshin's 21st today. bought him two pieces of cheese cakes from secret recipe. shared among we O.As. so it'll be specially from the OAs. haha... he was kinda shocked when i passed him the cakes. guess this is the first time he received cakes from friends?:rofl:
happy birthday, teckshin!
THREE things i'd do when i'm freakishly sad :-
1. scribbling
2. speeding
3. have a bowl of super hot and spicy noodles.
i did two out of the three this evening --- scribbling and speeding.
sarah is so...................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
so................................
SAD.
springie has this stupid idea -- late nite shopping. every first saturday of the month, springie will operate till midnite. so tenants have to operate till midnite as well.
my darling is on full shift today. supposed to be until 10pm. but he wanted to work till 12am cause springie's management will pay RM15 if punched out after 12am. i didnt want him to work till so late. cause he'll be on full shift agAIN tomorrow. dont wanna him to be too tired juz because of that merely RM15. after he insisted to work till midnite, my tone didnt go well when he wanted to take customer's altered pants from me. i'm kinda angry in terms of worrying. he then no mood. didnt even care to inform me when he went for dinner break. i started scribbling when found that he's got no mood. 6.30pm i punched out. speeded all the way home at 80+ km/h. tears fall when i was on my way home.
some more.... mission failed. actually wanted to change off day with fadzril *another O.A* cause my darling will be having class every thursday started this month.*so his off day will ve on thursday* but fadzril also wanna go dating........ so............... failed to switch off day with him.
S
A
D
sorry darling.... for the bad tone.
sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry sorry
==================================================
it's teckshin's 21st today. bought him two pieces of cheese cakes from secret recipe. shared among we O.As. so it'll be specially from the OAs. haha... he was kinda shocked when i passed him the cakes. guess this is the first time he received cakes from friends?:rofl:
happy birthday, teckshin!
May 2, 2008
surprise......
finally..... can chew my food properly liao... wheeeheeeee.... thank God... =)
BUT... still coughing like nuts and still dont want to go for doctor.x_x
=================================================
i have a secret.
am planning for a surprise.......
only for my darling. wahahahahahaha..........
BUT... still coughing like nuts and still dont want to go for doctor.x_x
=================================================
i have a secret.
am planning for a surprise.......
only for my darling. wahahahahahaha..........
May 1, 2008
labour day!!!
labour day = TRIPLE pay!!*applause please...* erm... actually it should be public holiday = TRIPLE pay. haha.... was on morning shift. so... i'll be getting around RM100+ for standing for nine hours. teeheehee.... regretted something. should have requested for full shift when my manager said that the counter there might not have enough staffs...*cries..* if i requested.. i'd have about RM150..T.T *stomping feet*
who to blame.... blame my stupidity....x_x
so....
it's 1st of may.. time flies in just a blink of eye. well... time always flies. just that we dont realise that. hehe...
should i or should i not to go for the july intake of local university? in a great dillemma... brother's off to miri soon. after he's off, it'd left me and my mum and also my precious darling.*my cat* then if i go for the july intake, it'll left only my mum alone with her friends and my precious darling here.*sigh long long* anyone can tell me what to do please....
if i were to go for the september intake.... i can accompany my mum for a longer time. can be with my precious darling and my darling for a longer time too... and and and can earn more money for the sake of my pocket money when going for local university.haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
oya!!! padini concept store at the spring,kuching would like to look for some temporary workers. chinese if can.*not racism here...* cause those creating problems are mostly non-cinese. anyone interested please to and ask for forms to fill. thanks...........
===================================
feel so bad... cause i still 'bio' engtau kias. sorry darling...................... i'll kick this habit off asap. love u lotz.................... =)
still coughing. still dun wanna go for doctor.
who to blame.... blame my stupidity....x_x
so....
it's 1st of may.. time flies in just a blink of eye. well... time always flies. just that we dont realise that. hehe...
should i or should i not to go for the july intake of local university? in a great dillemma... brother's off to miri soon. after he's off, it'd left me and my mum and also my precious darling.*my cat* then if i go for the july intake, it'll left only my mum alone with her friends and my precious darling here.*sigh long long* anyone can tell me what to do please....
if i were to go for the september intake.... i can accompany my mum for a longer time. can be with my precious darling and my darling for a longer time too... and and and can earn more money for the sake of my pocket money when going for local university.haizzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
oya!!! padini concept store at the spring,kuching would like to look for some temporary workers. chinese if can.*not racism here...* cause those creating problems are mostly non-cinese. anyone interested please to and ask for forms to fill. thanks...........
===================================
feel so bad... cause i still 'bio' engtau kias. sorry darling...................... i'll kick this habit off asap. love u lotz.................... =)
still coughing. still dun wanna go for doctor.
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